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Maybe it's time to rename Facebook....

I'm so tired of my news feed on Facebook (Babybook anyone?) being dominated by baby stuff today. I'm pissy and infertile, and I feel a headache coming on. I am hungry. I'm eating 1200 calories a day. I gave up candy and cookies and cokes. I have lost 20 fucking pounds. I'M IN PRIME SHAPE FOR HOUSING A SMALL HUMAN IN MY UTE.

I just want a baby. That's all. Just a baby. There are tons born every day, lots to mothers who don't even want them.

I've jumped through hoops. I've injected hormones derived from the piss of post-menopausal women into my abdomen. Buster and I have gotten in countless hormone-induced fights.

How much more of myself do I need to give?

Well, nothing more from myself. All infertility is requiring of me to have a baby is money. Lots of it.

I'm bitter and jaded today.

I apologize.

:(
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Comments

  1. taradawesJune 28, 2011 at 4:33 PM

    don't ever apologize for being bitter and jaded - some days just call for it. I've had to steer clear of facebook recently, way too many people I know popping out babies like it's the easiest thing in the world, or pissing and moaning about the kids they have and how they just want a "break"...some days I wonder why I'm friends with these people :(

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  2. KristaJune 28, 2011 at 4:35 PM

    I think we should re-name it "I only post about my children book."

    I know how you are feeling....

    :-(

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  3. JennyJune 28, 2011 at 5:13 PM

    There is absolutely no need to apologize. You have every right to feel bitter and jaded.

    *hugs*

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  4. KellyJune 28, 2011 at 5:22 PM

    You are completely allowed to feel like this and express it. It isn't fair at all and it f***ing sucks.

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  5. LindseyJune 28, 2011 at 5:27 PM

    I went to a BBQ this weekend and there were 9 babies under the age of 1... seriously? I guess I need to stop leaving my house and using all media to avoid them. On a positive note, a few months ago I took a 7 day break from FB and it was awesome, try it, its worth it. Now I look at it way less often.

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  6. LucieJune 28, 2011 at 5:27 PM

    You're allowed... Not every day is good and manageable. I avoidedFB foronths for the same reason. Babies everywhere (except here) and I was SO over it. Highly recommend a FB break...

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  7. StinkyJune 28, 2011 at 6:57 PM

    OMG yes, don't get me started on PimpMyBabybook, does my fucking nut in, have blogged about this so not going to rehash the same old dribble (for once). Thank god for the 'hide' function - I go and see the baby-fied on good days only. Sooooooo much better then. The bloke who didn't want babies ever but is not posting his newborn every week or so? Hideyhide. The woman who not content with posting every single status on her pregnancy now posts pretty much endless pix of her crotchfruit: Hideyhidehide. And the rest of them? Hidehidehidehide. (Ok, I started)

    Fertility is for stupid people, for people who hurt their children, and for rich people. And also for nice people that I like too, but fb is a fucker for perpetuating that conclusion

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  8. TJune 28, 2011 at 6:58 PM

    Love this post!! Sorry you have to go through this.

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  9. Melissa GJune 28, 2011 at 7:11 PM

    Dude, no need to apologize - we've ALL been there. The journey through IF is BRUTAL, and you have every right to feel the way you do. And expressing it here is the way to go. Cause we know it too well.

    And honestly, I can't tell you how many of my friends status updates have been "hidden", either in anticipation or because they are the cliche infertile yapping about their kids or complaining about their pregnancy. Which is precisely why we chose not to make an announcement on there... I get.

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  10. KCJune 28, 2011 at 7:15 PM

    We are all bitter and jaded. I wish there was a money tree exclusive for Intertiles. It would take some of the added stress off. I always look at celine dion with envy thinking she had no problem getting pregnant because she could do unlimited numbers of cycles. Actually, my deepest fear isn't that I won't have enough money it is that I won't get preggo no matter how many cycles I do. Anyways, as you can tell me are all bitter!

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  11. Baby HopesJune 28, 2011 at 8:39 PM

    I absolutely hear you... it's always when I'm in the midst of a cycle or just recovering from one that didn't work when all the babybook announcements seem to come. :( Sorry for the rough day...

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  12. meggolaJune 28, 2011 at 9:41 PM

    You go right ahead and vent! No apologies! Let it all out!

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  13. AnonymousJune 28, 2011 at 9:57 PM

    Im one of those weird people who dont do FB! It seems to get alot of people in trouble, and it amazes me to always hear how many 2day old babies have their own FB profiles. Do people lose their identity once they become parents?

    You need to be able to vent on your blog. Its safe and free of judgement. And you are surrounded by likeminded souls all feeling just as ripped off.

    Hope you feel better soon..

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  14. cdgJune 29, 2011 at 8:40 AM

    I totally get it, sometimes the unfairness of it all just gets to us. You are doing all that you can, there is no more then you can do. I am holding out hope for you...

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  15. AlexJune 29, 2011 at 10:08 AM

    No need to apologize - these are very real feelings that you have to get out! I hate Facebook... and those bitches that don't have anything to talk about other than their babies... Hang in there!

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  16. AnotherDreamerJune 29, 2011 at 2:18 PM

    Seriously, no need to apologize at all. Anyone who'd struggled with infertility has totally been there. Many (*hugs*) Those days suck. I hope your time comes soon, I really do. It's all so unfair.

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  17. UnknownJune 30, 2011 at 1:23 AM

    I would like to request that we get our own infertile parks? I don't want to be rundown by the mommy brigade while I'm having a pity party solo jog at the park. :(

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  18. AnonymousJune 30, 2011 at 3:00 PM

    Dont apologize. You're entitled to those feelings. Sorry you're going through this Kara! :(

    ReplyDelete

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