Wonder

On the TTC forums I frequent, there is a section entitled "Ask Your Questions to Our BFP Members." Recently I find myself itching to post there. Not about symptoms or anything exciting, as I never have symptoms. Or anything exciting, for that matter.

I want to know what it feels like to see a positive pregnancy test. To feel that immense joy coupled with anxiousness. To know how it feels to tell Buster that there is a part of him and me all mixed together in my belly. Or what it feels like to go to your first ultrasound and see a little formation that you know to be a baby on the screen. How it feels to hear the heartbeat of the little being that was created out of love.

I wish those feelings/emotions were bottled up and I could take some, just to see what it's like. I know it wouldn't be real, as I'm not pregnant, but I want to know regardless.

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In other news, I think I ovulated yesterday. I did not have any O pains, as I rarely do, but today I do not have any fertile CM, which I have had the past 4 or 5 days. I'm just ready for this cycle to be over so I can start my next. I'm really hopeful for it, which could be my downfall. But at this point, hope is all I have.

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I love this song. Colin Meloy is the lead singer of The Decemberists, and he is amazing. I think this song is about his lady being pregnant. If it's not, it is certainly what I think of when I hear it.

Comments

  1. I know that feeling hun. I have seen a BFP, but I am yearning to see an ultrasound. You will get there sweetie. I hope it's this cycle, but if not - I have some seriously high hopes for you for your upcoming plans!!!!

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  2. Kara- I hope you experience all those feeling soon! (hugs)

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  3. It's like the best high you've ever had - or in my case, could imagine... :) It's wonderful. Once you get those lines, you think it's all worth it - all the pain to get there has all been for something! It was so lovely, I can't wait to feel that way again... Keep feeling that hope, it will keep you going! I really hope it's your turn very soon!

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  4. I'm with Lisa. I want to know what it's like to have an u/s and actually see a baby...not an empty uterus. I want to know what it feels like to really be pregnant. I know that longing and yearning well...all I can say is hold on to hope. We'll all have it fulfilled someday!

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  5. Can't help you on the feeling . . . never seen two lines. But Iimagine it being awesome.
    I am excited for your new plans!

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  6. Yeah, I'm with meggola and Lisa as well. I've gotten my one faint BFP, and it was amazing, but I want to get an u/s and see a healthy baby growing inside of me.
    I want to experience pregnancy, and lord knows I want to have that euphoric feeling of when I hold my baby in my arms for the first time.
    We'll all have that, I just hope sooner rather than later.

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  7. I really hope you get to see a BFP...I promise that you will soon. *hugs*

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  8. Sigh... won't that be the day? Good luck hun!

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