Tuesday, March 13, 2012

I should have known

Friday night, Buster and I went to our favorite Italian restaurant. It's in the next town over, and even though there is nothing else in that town worth visiting, this restaurant is amazing.

Since it was Friday night, there was quite a long wait. So we sat and waited, while playing on our phones.

I was catching up on blogs. One of which was my dear friend Aub's blog. She posted a sneak peek photo from her maternity photo shoot. And it is amazingly beautiful.

I showed the photo to Buster, and he went on to tell me how he doesn't "understand those kind of pictures".


I tell him that I don't care if he understands them or not, I will be having them done. Because if I ever do get pregnant, there's a big chance that it might be the only time. And I want to remember.

Buster then said that he doesn't think I'll need photos to remember that time. So fucking incorrigible.

I rolled my eyes and told him how I actually emailed a local photographer in late December to see about scheduling a maternity photo shoot for me in the spring.

Cue me crumbling, center stage.

I got really quiet, and Buster couldn't stand it.

"Will you talk to me??"

But I couldn't bring myself to speak, because I knew instead of words, tears would pour out. Buster started to get agitated, so I explained to him why I was sad (even though I really don't think I should have had to explain that... but again, men...).

I told him she never got back to me, which is for the best now, obviously.

And this is why I should have known my period was on its way. Emotional breakdowns in restaurants.

Today is CD2. I go in tomorrow for blood work and an ultrasound, and we will see if there will be an FET for us in March.

I sure hope there will be.


  1. Sorry to hear of your emotional breakdown in the restaurant. It is a pretty good clue though hey! I get the same thing. I really hope you will have a FET in March and that it is your sticky BFP!!!!

  2. Its ok to have emotional breakdowns (often if necessary). Our husbands, we love them so much but sometimes they just dont get it.

    I hope that you are able to go forward with your FET in March!

  3. Men...seriously! Here's to hoping and praying for March FET!!! Thinking of you!

  4. Oh friend... Men will never get it, but I personally adore maternity photo shoots and can't wait until the day you get your own!

  5. CD2 here too, and emotional breakdown prompted by husband reminding me that we did have dinner coming so maybe I wanted to stop eating cheese and crackers? He was right, but I still managed to take offense. I don't know how he puts up with me. We have our FET the 2nd week of April, hope you get yours on the schedule soon as well!

  6. Men...their skulls are just too thick.

    I really hope you get the go-ahead for the FET! March is a nice, lucky month!

  7. Oh hon. I'm so sorry. They try, they really do. But sometimes there's a divide. And you're still healing.

    Fingers are crossed for good news from the blood work. I'm sincerely hoping for a FET in March for you.

  8. Oh, I hope so! I get very emotional before it too.
    Thinking of you!

  9. Friggin men! Isn't it amazing how they can one day surprise you with how thoughtful they can be then bam! Cavemen...goodluck with getting things rolling this month!

  10. I never got the whole pregnancy photo thing myself. I have one picture of me while pregnant, and that is enough. To be honest I was too afraid that something was going to go wrong, and I didn't want pictures around to remind me if they did. Ug, how infertility messes with our minds!

    I hope that this month is the one for you, and you get those pregnancy shots you want. :)

  11. Sometimes not talking is the only way to hold back the flood of tears. Fingers crossed for a successful FET this month!!!

  12. Men! My husband felt the pain of our miscarriage right away and then he got over it. For the next year I would tear up at anything having to do with babies and he would question me, "What are you crying for?" For me the pain was in anything having to do with what I imagined for myself before the miscarriage. And that pain last much longer. Guys just don't get it! They deal with it and are over it.

  13. Have a photo shoot once a month for nine months! You deserve it. You document and remember every single moment. Blokes just don't get it.

  14. I tell my husband the same thing. I'd like to go all out if we ever get pregnant because what if we never experience it again. He doesn't get it either! Well, best of luck to you. ;)

  15. Ugh, men. Sorry he didn't get it and for the breakdown (*hugs*)

  16. Silly man, he loves you lots though xxx I can't wait for this cycle for you, fingers crossed its all systems go....march is a good month for ivf, look at my luck...your turn now my love xxx

  17. *sigh* Men. They just don't get it.

    I'm sorry about your breakdown. I'll keep my fingers crossed that your FET happens soon and that you'll be looking for a new maternity photographer.

  18. Men are so clueless sometimes.
    Keeping everything crossed that it's a go for this month!

  19. I hate when those emotional breakdowns come on in public venues!! So sorry girl!!

    Hoping that things are full speed ahead for your FET!

  20. A note for you in the Stirrup Queens Lushary: http://www.stirrup-queens.com/2012/03/toasts/#comment-79731

    Chin up and one step at a time - you're in our thoughts and hopes!

  21. Ugh - men really don't understand, do they! Hugs to you...


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