Friday, March 9, 2012

penalty: delay of game

Well.

Today is cycle day 34. My longest cycle ever.

Sorry for the lackluster update, but I just don't know what to say about it. I'm disappointed, but not surprised.

Based on my pepperoni pizza face, I would have guessed AF should have been here by now. Nothing like having her MIA and having the face of a teenager (although I'd gladly have a face of pimples if I could have my teenage body back...).

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It's been nine weeks since my D&C.

I would be 19 weeks pregnant this weekend.

Mondays, Fridays, and Sundays. Each one that passes marks another milestone I'm missing or anniversary of devastation. I want to stop thinking of this stuff on these days, but most of the time I can't help it.

Monday - day of the worst ultrasound of my life

Friday - day of my D&C

Sunday - would be the day a new pregnancy milestone was reached

That's too many days of the week infused with negative emotions and sadness.

17 comments:

  1. Hugs <3 I remember "remembering" all those days, too. (Mine were Monday, Wednesday, Sunday.) I wish so much that AF would get here so that you can move forward instead of just spinning your wheels.

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  2. I remember those milestones all too well also. Tuesdays and Thursdays for me.

    I can tell you that while I still remember that, it's not heavy on my heart every Tuesday and Thursday anymore.

    Hoping that AF will hurry up so you can keep moving forward. **Hugs**

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  3. I am sending you lots of hugs today. Truly hoping that AF shows her face so you can get this show on the road :)

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  4. I'm so sorry :( Before I had known about my m/c I had signed up for these weekly little pamphlets to get in the mail for every week telling me about that week in my pregnancy. So I still get them, reminding me of what I lost. I hope your AF will hurry so you can move on!

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  5. Big hugs. I've heard it gets better.

    I am glad (sort of...a weird feeling) that others remember those 'days' too. I made the mistake of writing it on my calendar at the beginning of every month. It's a downer.

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  6. I hope that over time some good memories will infiltrate those days. At least to even things out a bit. I had a Monday and a Wednesday. Now Monday and Wednesday don't mean the same, but those two specific days in October still bring it all back. Give yourself time, you've been through a lot.

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  7. Ugh, I'm so sorry. I had those days too - Thursdays and Fridays. Friday the 13th will forever haunt me. And early April - when I was due. I had pizza face too afterwards, and it took forever for the bloating to go away and for me to get an AF. It's all so cruel. It definitely gets better with time though. Things got a lot easier for me once I got past my EDD. Many hugs to you!

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  8. Also sending hugs. Those milestones are not the kind you want to remember.

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  9. Think of you often! you are so strong - it will all "come together"

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  10. My 2nd cycle after D&C was 6 days longer than normal, so I guess it's not so abnormal. I am sure you will be CD1 very soon.

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  11. Here is hoping CD1 shows up soon. Will you be going back to the same place? Thinking of you.

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  12. Sorry to hear it's taking your body so long to move on. After my chemical last year, I had 2 of my shortest cycles ever and my FSH & LH were messed up for the next 2-3 cycles. M/C really mess up the body in more ways than one, but I hope yours starts to rebound ASAP!

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  13. My day's are Wednesday and Thursday. I try not to think about those milestone days...and at almost 5 months post delivery, I am doing well at letting it just pass as a day of the week.
    Keep doing what you are doing...you will get there.

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  14. So sorry honey. Giving you a big Hug!

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