Monday, November 15, 2010

So please remember me, finally, and all my uphill clawing.


A gloomy mid-November day is struggling against the clouds to hang on. It so badly wants to get dark outside, but a light gray is all that is feasible at this time of the day. It is certainly depressing, but the weather could be much worse. It usually is, halfway through November.

I am getting ready to O. I had a slight temp rise today, but I'm not sure if that is indicative of O or not. I guess tomorrow's temp will give me an answer. DH starts afternoon shift today, so getting BD in won't be nearly as easy as it was before. I kind of hope I did O already, then at least I won't have to worry about it this week!

This weekend, I once again struggled with facing my infertility demons in unexpected places. Saturday night we went to dinner at my parent's house. I sat upstairs for a few minutes and was just zoning out watching TV. It was Grey's Anatomy, and the episode where they show Addison's new practice. She was talking about her infertility. I mean, I only sat down for like 5 minutes. She could have at least waited until I got up!

The other (kind of expected) show which had a slight infertility storyline is the Starz series Spartacus: Blood and Sand. DH and I watched this when it was on Starz, but we recently got the first season on Netflix just for a show to watch. I had forgotten how one of the main characters struggled with infertility. This is set back in old Roman times, and there was a scene in an episode we just watched in which a fertility shaman lady came to the infertile woman's house and performed some ritual to help her conceive. I wish I knew of a fertility shaman!

I googled infertility therapist today. Of course, there is nothing of the sort in my area. I also spent some time looking for any other reproductive endocrinologists in the area, and there are none. Just one! How sad. Hopefully I won't need to return to that clinic after this month, but chances are that I will.

And finally, I leave you with The Trapeze Swinger by Iron and Wine. It's a perfect song for a gray day!

5 comments:

  1. I am so sorry that you are struggling. I am sending lots of love to you. Did you try resolve's website? They have therapist listings there and can help you find resources in your area. hang in there.

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  2. I love Iron and Wine. Great choice.

    Isn't it amazing how some days you just can't seem to get away from IF? I hope you don't need to revisit the clinic either. :hugs:

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  3. I had the same kind of weekend. I am starting to wonder if anyone I know that is between 25-35 isn't pregnant. I made the mistake of buying People Magazine and the top three stories were that Pink and Mariah Carey are pregnant and that Kelly Preston is in labor.

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  4. Oh I remember both of those episodes.
    Doesn't it suck when it feels like the world just wants to rub infertility in our faces?

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