Sunday, October 24, 2010

Between the sunset and certified darkness

Last night, the crazy in me took over and I peed on a stick. It was a BFN, of course. Considering I was 6dpo (probably) or 8dpo (possibly), this is not a surprise. I think I will take a couple days off before testing again. Or at least today...

On another note, I've been incredibly bitchy to my poor DH as of late. We had to sit down and have a talk. It's that bad. I like to think it's mostly due to fertility medicine, but I'm not sure that's completely true. I think I am just feeling worn out by TTC. I know I haven't done as much treatment as others, but the temping, charting, obsessing is just getting old and wearing me down. And I don't foresee myself stopping. So the only way to cure my insanity is for me to get pregnant.

Great.

6 comments:

  1. Oh Kara, I'm sorry you got a bfn. (You are early and I hope I didn't offend you the today about you testing early!) I completely understand how you feel though. I know I have not went through as many tests and drugs as some ladies but the obsessing and duration is getting old. I never thought it would take us this long to have our baby, this is just torture. I am glad you had a talk, that always helps. I hope your DH can understand where you're coming from. I hear you on the not stopping anytime soon. I keep saying I need a break from TTC but who am I kidding, I won't give up. Stay strong hun!! Good luck!

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  2. ((((Hugs))))) I've heard that the people we love the most are the ones we hurt the most. Lucky them, eh? ;)

    Remember to breathe... always. It's the only thing we absolutely *have* to do, everything else comes second.

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  3. HUGS!! I understand hun. Hang in there xx

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  4. My husband has pretty much accepted that i will not be back to my normal self until I am pregnant. It is awful that it takes over our lives but it is really unavoidable.

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  5. I don't think it matters how long you've been at this, it's always tiring. In fact, I think my first two years at it were the hardest. I do think to a certain degree I won't be myself again when I am pregnant, but I think that's because IF has changed me. And not in all bad ways either. :)

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  6. TTC is so mentally exhausting, hopefully your husband can understand just how hard it is for you.
    Here's to hoping that you just tested too early this time. I have discovered that the only way to stop myself from peeing on a stick is to not buy any more HPT's.
    (Stopping by for ICLW)

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