Friday, January 20, 2012

the unpregnancy

After posting practically every day since we found out our baby died, I have been slacking.

I just don't have much to say I guess.

I am, of course, still dealing with the emotional aftermath of a miscarriage. And the hormonal imbalance of a body that was pregnant one day, and not pregnant the next. Today marks two weeks since the d&c.

Unpregnancy symptoms:

  • My face has broken out horribly. Much like it does when AF arrives, and when I ovulate. I was enjoying the break from these cyclical self-esteem killers. At 30, I always assumed I'd have nice skin. But, I assumed I'd have babies too. The younger me was laughably naive.
  • No more sore boobs. In the beginning of my pregnancy, they weren't sore either. But as things progressed, they started to get sore and tender. No more, which is great news for Buster. He can go back to the surprise tweaking of my nips whenever he's feeling feisty (and just to clarify, this happens when we are not "doing it", this happens while I'm cooking dinner, or walking through the house, or whenever he feels like it).
  • The veins that made a dramatic appearance on my boobs have diminished. They are still a little more noticeable than they were in the past, but nothing like a couple weeks ago.
  • I am no longer going to bed at 8:30 p.m. I've been staying up until 11:00 p.m. (gasp!), and on work nights! So, no more fatigue.
  • The pangs of nausea I had been feeling every now and again have subsided. I did have some leftover nausea last week, but I can happily report that as of this week, it is no longer. I never really minded the nausea when I was pregnant, but after the d&c, it just seemed like a cruel joke.

So, the unpregnancy seems to be almost complete. I will head in for another beta on Monday.

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Some random thoughts:

Every time I see a preview for Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close, I cry.

I really plan to do a TV post soon. I've been watching Project Runway All Stars, Face Off, and Top Chef. Oh, and Dance Moms (don't ask! I blame the fact that last season it was on directly after Project Runway. I don't really have an excuse for continuing to watch it. It's the whole "train wreck" phenomenon...).

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7 comments:

  1. UGH!! I hate acne! I never used to have it either!

    I also had to go bra shopping because I have gone up a cup size since my last cycle and they haven't shrunk yet, but the veins have!

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  2. My worst "unpregnancy" symptom after the miscarriage was my boobs kept producing colostrum! It was a good month before they finally got the message and finally went back to normal. Good luck on your beta, hoping it's almost 0 so you can start moving on.

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  3. The unpregnancy pregnancy symptoms really sucked eggs. Now they have been gone for me for about two weeks...but what next?

    Every time I see that preview I get teary eyed too! I would like to see the movie, but I'm afraid I'll bawl my eyes out for the entire thing.

    I hope your HCG is down to 0, or at least close to it.

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  4. Don't feel bad, my HUSBAND watches Dance Moms.

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  5. All husbands must do the random nipple tweak thing heh. Just their way of showing that they care I guess :P

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  6. I hope your hcg is a lot lower next time. Hopefully your body can heal and get back to normal soon <3

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  7. sorry to hear all this...i'm 30 also and my face breaks out more now from all the TTC business. keep ur head up! project runway all stars is getting pretty good i might say!

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